continuation from Part One: Disability Ministry with InterVarsity and Part Two: Disability Justice and Theology
Some ways I've been looking at the world differently.
- God created people with disabilities on purpose as part of human diversity. Disabilities reflect the glory and beauty of God.
- A common secular disability justice view: My body/disability isn't the problem. Inaccessibility is the problem. For example: a staircase without a ramp or elevator is the problem. Lack of listening or caring is the problem.
- We need to listen to and learn from disabled people who are willing to share. They have a view of the world and a voice that shares God’s truth that we often overlook. (And not as “inspirational overcoming” stories.)
- Building the world for disabled people benefits everyone. There’s even a term for it: the Curb Cut effect. (Curb cuts were made for wheelchairs, but they help carts and strollers too. Disability designs help people who are temporarily disabled due to injuries, and they help people even in a moment of situational distraction! (More history on this 99% Invisible podcast episode.)
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| Ira, Joan and Ginger in an audio recording space |
Thoughts about Heaven
I don't know what heaven is actually like. I don’t usually focus on it too much, but Heaven can be important for believers because our view of God’s perfect world influences how we live in the world here and now. (Once, on being asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come, Jesus replied, “The coming of the kingdom of God is not something that can be observed, nor will people say, ‘Here it is,’ or ‘There it is,’ because the kingdom of God is in your midst.” -Luke 17:20-21)
It's fun to speculate about, but I don’t want to claim special knowledge. (Stephen’s favorite Bible verse is John 3:12: “I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things?” I don’t think we can fully grasp Heaven, except to work on improving our view on earthly things!) On Brandi's podcast episode, she said some people think that in Heaven, we'll all be running around as "22 year olds with perfect beach bodies." I honestly can't stop laughing about this. I grew up believing Heaven was bodiless; that we would just be spirits floating around. (We got this idea from Plato, though I always assumed it was Biblical.)
Studying from native teachers like Dr. Randy Woodley has helped me understand that physical things (God's creation!) have value, and aren't separate from spiritual things. White folks have often been too disconnected from our bodies and our planet. Dr. Randy has a good talk here on youtube, and I recommend any of his books.
Also, having conversations about race and gender in heaven has been enlightening: I have found most people to be pretty attached to their race and gender. Us “colorblind” white people often think our whiteness is invisible or "normal" and imagine we'll be race-less in heaven (because we tend to feel race-less now). But telling other groups they'll lose their race in Heaven often feels like losing a key part of their identity. (There is a religion that preaches that black people will become white in Heaven... this is not as inspiring as they think it is.) I also assumed we'd be genderless in Heaven (no marriage, no procreation, so who cares?) But I've found other people are likewise attached to their gender, and that gender identity goes deeper into their soul than mere sex organs. (I would still rather be genderless in Heaven; but I'm realizing I'm in the minority for that feeling.)
Back to disability: Some people look forward to bodily healing in heaven, and I don't want to "take it away" from them. But like the beach body joke, I have concerns about how people view the perfect heavenly body. Does it have to be as thin as modern Western beauty standards? Are wrinkles and white hairs un-heavenly? How many parts of your body do you consider ugly or not good enough?
A elderly family member with an unknown disability passed away recently. (Think of it as being something similar to Down's Syndrome.) His cousin said, "It's so nice that he won't be disabled in heaven!" I pondered that statement for weeks afterward. Why is it nice? He won't be himself in heaven? His disability is written into his genes: does his facial shape need to change? Does he need a higher IQ to fully enjoy Heaven? (Do we all get higher IQs in heaven? Will it be standardized?)
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| Tillman, Ira and two guy friends. Three have cerebral palsy |
A side note on IQ.
It's a controversial subject because 1. it can be seen as assigning a value to a person and 2. IQ tests aren't written to be fair- there's accidental bias toward Western thought and white values. A friend of mine was once told that his IQ was "too low" for college. (He now has a bachelor's degree.) But this friend has always seemed smart to me: He asks good questions, considers both sides, and is willing to learn new things. I know some "smart" people who think they are too good to learn anything new.
My gifted-education teacher friend likes to make the case for the usefulness of IQ and similar tests because it's helpful to kids to put them in the class where they'll thrive. The problem isn't that kids are learning differently, just that we treat learning differently as good or bad. Personally, I've always been very good at taking standardized tests. It's like they were written just for me! (Ahem.) Yet, amazingly, life outside the educational system isn't at all like standardized tests, and it’s pointless to be an adult bragging about your SAT score from when you were 18.
Back to heaven…
It's true that my family member may not have gotten to live a full life on earth because of his disability. Our culture certainly restricted him in many ways. Yet, the American Dream is not the dream of the Kingdom of God. Getting degrees, impressive jobs, fame, and money isn't the way of Jesus. This family member did live a Christ-centered life, serving in his capacity, being kind, and he passed away known as a good friend to all. As we sat by his bed in his final days, his sister said, "I wish I had as many friends as you! I should be a nicer person." So, I like to think that he’ll flourish to be fully himself in heaven, and the societal expectations and standards won’t limit him anymore. (So, in a way, his cousin was right. He won’t be “disabled” by the world anymore.)
My next heavenly imagination story is from fiction. Did you grow up reading, "A Wrinkle in Time" by Madeleine L'Engle? The children in the story visit several different planets, including one where the furry beast inhabitants are all blind. They don't, of course, consider themselves as blind or disabled. Instead, they have a funny conversation with the children as they try to understand why the children feel sorry for them.
The beasts ask the children what "seeing" means, and the children try their best to remember what they learned in science class:
Light comes from the sun, hits an object, and the light bounces back into our eyes, letting us perceive the shape of the object.
What about when the sun is gone? The beasts wonder.
We have artificial lights! The children explain.
The children are shocked to realize that the beasts think that humans are the ones disabled and limited. The beasts are blind only by human standards. They perceive their world differently. “We do not know what things look like. We know what things are like. It must be a very limiting thing, this seeing.”
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| Ira and Petrina with Disability resources staff, silly posing by office door sign. |
Side thoughts on chronic illness:
Chronic illness and pain fall under the disability umbrella as they too require special accommodation and limit full flourishing in our world. I totally understand that a diabetic wouldn’t want to continue giving themself injections and constantly testing for imbalances in Heaven. The important overlap here is still access: people in America literally die because they can't afford insulin. Our capitalist system values profit above everything else. My friend Kristian shares a lot about diabetes justice and health issues. She recommends following these instagram accounts to learn more.
I pondered chronic pain more. On one hand, Heaven shouldn't have pain. It doesn't serve a long-term purpose. (It does have a very useful short-term purpose of letting you know something is wrong with your body, and that you need to address that quickly.)
But, there could be some purposeful pain in Heaven. My cousin once asked me if we continue to grow in Heaven or not. I think we do. In C.S. Lewis' "The Great Divorce," new arrivals to Heaven are flimsy ghosts. They have a long journey to become strong, solid, and fully themselves. (‘Will you come with me to the mountains? It will hurt at first, until your feet are hardened. Reality is harsh to the feet of shadows. But will you come?’)
Likewise, athletes experience pain as their muscles grow. I feel nervous talking about athletes though, as again, human values for victory, striving, and glory, can permanently damage the body rather than promote bodily flourishing. Athletes often pursue winning over actual strengthening, and there are many unhealthy teachings embedded in athlete culture. But, I like the idea that there is a healthy version of this, where a bit of pain and a bit of growth work together.
As a (mostly) able-bodied person, I don’t want to tell disabled folks how to feel about their own bodies and lives. You know yourself best. But, I hope I can offer alternatives to mainstream Christian culture. I realize this can sound annoying though. Similarly, I want to tell people of all sizes that they’re beautiful and made in God’s image, but I understand if the response is: “Easy for you to say, skinny!”
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| four women sitting on floor or cushions, discussing mental health struggles at Urbana '22 |
I also don’t want to minimize the realities of disability. Both physical issues and cultural issues are serious challenges. I think about my friend with ADHD who cried the first day she found a helpful medication.
“This is how people feel? Usually when I get my daughter ready for school in the morning, I’m so stressed and there’s so much going on in here… [today] I was so calm and my mind was so clear… many people function like this… do the things [they] need to do… I’ve been struggling my entire life.” (She also attributes some aspect of her amazing artistic skills to her neurodiversity, so I don’t mean to imply she wants to be rid of it entirely. Her medication story is on youtube.
Disabled people see the world differently. Sometimes this is a call for justice: for affordable health care, for access to churches, education, and politics, for bathrooms and ramps and hallways that fit everyone. Sometimes this is a call for rest: to listen to our bodies, to care for them, to work in God’s time rather than the world’s rush. (Again, I highly recommend Dr. Amy Kenny’s “My Body is Not a Prayer Request.”)
Disabled people make the world a better place than my western, American culture values for striving, money, and superficial appearances. We all get to see beauty and purpose in things the world calls ugly and useless.
“But God chose the ‘foolish’ things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. God chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things—and the things that are not—to nullify the things that are.” -1 Corinthians 1:27-28
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